It is quite fascinating to step back and watch people…in a non stalker way. If you are too involved with feelings and emotions then it is very possible you will miss the actual meaning behind people’s words or actions. If you are not looking for something, it is hard to see what you are missing (learned this from a youtube video at Freshman Orientation). But once you succeed at the ability to remove yourself mentally from the situation, it’s suddenly like the curtain is pulled back from an otherwise unnoticed window. (Sometimes I get crazy with the metaphors.)
Someone’s actions, at first, may seem hurtful or inconsiderate. Initially you can be confused as to why they would act and/or say such things to you. As a girl (and I am guilty for this sometimes) tears may naturally ensue. But stop crying and think. Look at this person from a different point of view. It may now become obvious that this person is actually super insecure or upset. And the natural (yet immature) response when someone is hurt is to inflict similar pain on others. It could also just be one of those things psychologists love…where something in their past is subconsciously causing this person to… act crazy (summer 2011 favorite phrase).
Now that I’ve acquired how to do this, I learn a lot about people from their indirect actions. Subliminals is the word that describes most of what I’m talking about, I guess. Some of the people in my life…the ones I’m in the process of cutting out…try to send hurtful ones. Now that I can confidently attribute all of their nonsense with hurt or jealousy I can’t help but giggle at their failed attempts to mess with my mind and feelings. People really need to learn to be concerned with their own lives. It only makes you look more pathetic when it’s clear you took time out of your own life to try and destroy someone else’s. That’s advice for my friends and a “you aren’t fooling anyone” to my enemies.
All in all…stop and look at someone’s whole life and possible feelings before making a judgment call. People may not be purposely trying to hurt you. Or if they are, it may just be because they are actually hurt themselves.